I get chills just thinking about it. That and the fact this was brought to us by the same guy who made a squeaky voiced Ralph Macchio roar.
This is how we meet our hero...
Its now occured to me that the movie's tagline "Left for dead..." isn't exactly true. More like "Wasted Loser Life, Might Get Up Later."
As the movie will explain to you (through the ramblings of a drunk JCVD) he's here in the middle of nowhere to drink himself to death over his actions while serving in the Army. Honoring his Army training, he recklessly fires shots in the air, which makes Johnny Sixtoes disappear (the name stays though) and a group of guys in a truck appears upset about JCVD's inability to understand gun safety.
Guns, grenades and cowboy hats....Van Damme for President 2016.
It should be mentioned...
Johnny Sixtoes comes back. He's also Danny Trejo, pretending we don't remember his name is actually Johnny Sixtoes.
You would think this movie would be about JCVD overcoming his suicidal guilt Army thoughts, but no, its just about him getting back at the guys who got mad at him for almost shooting them. So his plan of attack is, kill the guys and have Hot Waitress and Mr. Miyagi help dispose of the bodies, making this one of the darkest movies I've watched for this blog (please keep in mind I sat through two Insane Clown Posse productions).
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